An Endless Love

Luther Vandross made a single I still enjoy listening to entitled Endless Love. I don't think he was the first to sing it, and Mariah Carey joins him in the ballad. Those who know anything about Luther know he could deliver a mean performance, making lovers grow closer and anyone single want to be loved. Truly, he was a gifted artist who is still missed today.

I have spent a better part of a year's time embracing intervals, changing and growing through seasons, and transitioning-literally and figuratively...From the physical changes on my job to the on-and-off emotional stages.

On most days, I still find it hard to believe I am an adult who lives independently and is blessed immeasurably. On most days, I lift my head from my pillow, hold my head high and smile big to make the best of the day. On most days, while a small sadness may be within, I strive never to allow others to see or know the hurts, trials, or silent prayers prayed asking for confidence, patience, and love.

A few months ago, I was driving and came across a billboard for a popular cellular phone company that read: Signal is Strength. It got me to thinking and truly reflecting on how amazing the love of Christ is for all of us--an Endless Love. Better than any love I have ever experienced from a human, His love is so powerful and more tangible than skeptics question. Where I've been weak, He has brought me people who are strong. When I have questioned or doubted, He has restored loudly and clearly with answers and promotions. Through periods of sadness, He has brought me wonderful, beautiful friendships of those who may not have known or understood my full situation but would give obediently, selflessly, and in timely fashion.

I can sit here and type tonight that a connection to Him--a real relationship--is strength. It is manifested in the growth I have had through my church. I see it in the accountability offered via my best friend, who does not even realize how vital her presence in my life is. There is recognition in the way I feel...about myself and life. Like the little bars one sees on a cellular phone providing information about how strong the signal is, I realize mine is stronger than it has been in a long time...For a moment, I was going through the motions but had hit a real wilderness experience. However, His Endless Love kept strong. While my signal was low, the strenth of His love allowed me to stay within reach to be helped.

Tonight I realize I have an awesome service provider whose signal never fails! I recognize that I have the best life ever (words stolen from VLM). My life is not perfect, but it is special, purposeful, and full of potential. Excitedly, I am embracing the steps ahead because I know there is an endless love where the strength of it is so strong that even if I wander off the path, a signal will bring me back...He guides me.

Connect the Dots

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. dot 1 - Generosity
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... dot 2 - Encouragement
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.. dot 3 - Support
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.. dot 4 - Joy...
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.. dot 5 - Love . .
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My intention is not to change but inspire you.

Do you remember as a child the amount of activities in school requiring you to connect-the-dots? Perhaps, it was your parent or family member who liked to buy you activity books with the game.

Being a person who loved puzzles, the idea of putting dots together seldom seemed bothersome. In fact, there were times when I found it a relief to have mindless work, where I could get out some crayons or color pencils and show my creativity and skills. On a few occasions I would become a little perturbed with how easy this game of making a picture was (e.g., knowing it was of a Christmas tree or banana), but I still went along and did the assignment or went through the entire activity book.

So, as an adult, what on earth could a game like connect-the-dots have to do with my world now? While I am an educator, that is not the purpose. For two weeks in a row, I have attended church an had the message to speak loud volumes to me about how I am living, what I am doing, and (more importantly) answering the questions I continue to visit in prayer. At times, it is pretty mind-boggling...almost a bit scary...yet in the same moment there is relief.

This idea takes two directions...

There are current dots in my life I continue to try to connect, and I feel as though the "big" picture is not turning into the masterpiece it's meant to be. For me, this hurts because like a good child and student I am putting everything in it (e.g. love, support, etc.) but can't seem to have a nice return. Yep, I know that is screaming rip that puppy up and move on to an easier puzzle or new challenge. The stubbornness in me desires to keep at it, thinking that perhaps the fault isn't in the creation but the one trying to do the puzzle...The truth is, though, maybe the issue isn't puzzle or the person doing the puzzle but that it's not meant to be solved.

In another thought, there is beauty in knowing that I don't ever have to worry about the BIG picture because as long as I am faithful in following God's will and walking in my purpose, the dots connecting and path followed--the good and bad--will lead me to the masterpiece He desires. And, isn't that really what it is all about?

I am defeated but never destroyed. I am tested but will not grow tired.

There is a systematic order to the game connect-the-dots, and for this I am grateful. There is a lesson in discipline, obedience, and following. As puzzling as it is, we've got to keep at the bigger game called life, knowing that it was never meant that we live life in sadness, depression or with a feeling of worthlessness. If I cannot be of good or use to another's dot connecting, I've got to go back to my own and ensure I am moving to the proper dot on the page.